January 5. Thursday Night.

Hi Journey.

Today I finally realized I'm pushing away some of the best prospects I have.

It's almost midnight. The last two hours I've been at the shop, yanking down every damn award and diploma and certificate off my office wall.

I don't know what's going in their place, yet, but I know they don't belong there. Maybe some nice prints, maybe framed carpet or fabric swatches; anything other than my big ego.

Lexie Kunpil was in today. She's a lawyer I met about six months ago. Some downtown party, I think. Not like I've went to that many (although that's about to change!) Not sure, really. Maybe last summer's kickoff for the Downtown Association's blood drive? I think that was it. Anyway, she let on she might want to modernize her basement Family Room as the kids were grown and it was just her and her husband now.

Journey, can you say “clone-client”?

Of course I sincerely smiled and told her: “Sure, give me a buzz anytime.”

Well last Friday she did; we set up an appointment for this morning.

Guess I must have been feeling down today. Last night I was up studying Ace the MBA Exam in the middle of the night. December Receivables are down from where I thought they'd be. Still, up from last year, and actually ahead of Joni's most optimistic projection. I set my financial forecasting sights sky-high. And I also know I shouldn't be down right now, Journey, but I am. Post-holiday letdown, I suppose.

Lexie had brought in her photos for the Snapshot Session, just like I had asked. We sat at the desk, her across from me. I offered her the chair on the left-hand side and then pulled out the chair next to her a few inches from the edge of the desk and she promptly put her purse and her briefcase there. But for some reason every time we started discussing her current Family Room or some of her favorite outfits or her kids I felt an overpowering urge to steer the conversation back to one of my accomplishments. Twice I actually caught myself pointing to my diploma and commenting on something about a class I'd had in Smith that related to what we were discussing about her family.

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